Coffee or Hot Chocolate?

How about both?

Last week/weekend was horrible. In fact, it wasn't like an actual weekend, but an extension to the work week. Here is how things went.

Thursday

Work 7-6
Work 7-12
Sleep

Friday

Work 7-6
Dinner with friends 7-10
Sleep

Saturday

Move 7-2X
Work 3X-12
Sleep

Sunday

Move 8-3X
Visit with friends 3X-7
Sleep

I barely had time to eat, let alone sleep this weekend. I am still worn out. For the first time, I smelled coffee and wanted some! I don't even like coffee. I poured myself a cup and was debating over regular or hazelnut creamer. I came to the conclusion it didn't matter which I choose I would still be gagging this shit down. That's when I saw it. The box of hot chocolate. Hot chocolate? Hot chocolate! But that was too sweet! So, I did what anyone would do. I used the packet of hot chocolate as creamer so now I have a yummy coffee that tastes like it could have came from Starbucks, only it didn't cost me $6.89!!!!

YAY! I know I've said it before. I'm a genius! They should promote me!

Weddings are STUPID!

Weddings. Are. Stupid.

Let me explain...

I work weddings ALL the time, I bartend for them. I LOVE weddings. I make LOTS of money at weddings.

I would rather WORK a wedding than be A PART of the wedding.

Lover's best friend is getting married in April and he is one of two groomsmen and the best man. A few weeks ago, they all went out looking for a suit/tux to wear. They didn't really find anything, BUT there was this awesome deal for a tux. It would be like $75 for everything. Isn't that great? It's a wonderful deal and it saves EVERYONE money! YAY! So... They decide they will go back closer to the wedding date and get those...

What happens today?

Ring ring.... ring... ring ring...

"Hi, Baby!"

"Hey, so did you redue the budget?"

I have our finances budgeted out for a year and I am updating it daily or when major things change.

"Yup."

"Where is it?"

Where the hell is this conversation going? I don't know why Lover is so worried about it, it's not like he has ANY access to spend money. I took that away from him. "I forgot it at work yesterday, why?"

"Well, Jeff*, Joe's* best man, got us suits."

"Oh wow, that's great! I mean, he bought them for you guys."

"Well, he bought them, but we have to pay him back."

Now, I didn't even know the amount. Frankly, how much Jeff paid for the suits is irrelevant, because JEFF never should have gone out and made a financial decision without consulting the rest of the group. JEFF needs to take a Business 101 class on how things are handled in the REAL world. Because in the real World, if I don't tell you that I want something, you don't get it for me. AND if you do get it for me, you don't ask me to pay you for it. I didn't want it. If I wanted it, I would have told you. Did I tell you I wanted it? No. Well?

"Oh?"

"Yea, it uhhh..." (I always know when Lover is going to tell me something I don't want to hear because he says uhhhh, well, ummm a lot) "it came out to about $600 so we owe him about $216."

"My ass! We can't afford that. Who the hell does Jeff think he is? He can't just go out and make a financial decision for everyone. I thought you guys all agreed on getting the tux's"

"So did I."

"Well, you need to call Joe and tell him we can't afford it. You need to tell him that Jeff had no right make that decision and if anyone decided to wear suits, then we could have RENTED yours. We don't have the money. I swear if we have to buy this suit, then Joe doesn't get a wedding present. We. Can't. Afford. It. You need to fix this."

"I'll call Joe and just tell him we weren't expecting this."

"Yea, and make sure he knows we CANNOT afford it. And that Jeff had no right doing this."

"Okay, Babe. I am sure he is at work right now, but I'll call him."

I'm still PISSED! It's things like this that make me want to take up smoking again.

* Names changed just in case the rest of the World knows who they are, I want to protect them from being publicly flogged for stupidity! Well, maybe I don't want to protect them from it, but I certainly don't want to be sued for their flogging, if you know what I mean ;)

The Time I Almost Got to Party with Smash Mouth (Part 3)

Newbies to this series should first read this, and then this.



Okay, are you caught up now? Perfect!



We left off on my perpetual need to down some vodka.



After that glass and a half, I slowed down a bit and started using it as a sipping vodka. That slut, Jackie, snuck away with James. They went away "to talk." Yea right! They went away to park his tour bus in parking garage she probably had going on down there. Bitch!


The rest of the night is a little hazy, I do remember being told that Smash Mouth has broken down somewhere around Crystal Lake, so they were camping there for the night. Umm... Yea, right! They were probably living it up at the Hilton or perhaps staying with their families for the night. Good cover, but I didn't buy it.



Nothing bad happened to us, THANK GOODNESS and we all ended up back in our own hotel rooms (meaning the four girls in our room and the men in their own room) and went to bed sometime around 1 in the morning. I was laying there, and I couldn't go to sleep. The room was spinning. I didn't feel like I needed to throw up, but I was tired! I was damn tired, and after 20 minutes of trying to stop the room from turning around and around, I walked to the bathroom and inserted finger.



If there is one thing about me, it is that I DO NOT like to "be drunk." I don't like the feeling of throwing up, so I rarely if ever drink enough to make myself throw up. There might be one or two nights in a year, where I get so wasted, that I force myself to throw up, so that I can go to bed.



The next morning, we might have said goodbye to James and Ted, maybe we didn't. After all, they weren't as much fun as we thought (or perhaps they weren't as dangerous as we expected).



We left early after getting ready and went to do what girls do best... Shop! We went to the mall, and did some browsing, maybe some shopping. Then, Katrina and Sara decided to use the "hotel" money that was supposed to be used on the cousin to get manicures. This left Jackie and I to spend time together, we spent it out in the parking lot smoking cigarettes. In said parking lot we met another guy, let's call him Mike. Mike, was working in the back of what appeared to be a UHaul. What he was really doing was promoting the new 5 blade razors from Shick (I think, maybe not. It's the orange razor. Got it? Cool.). Wait, that's still not right. Mike was pit-man for a drag racer. Shick sponsored them, so he was out doing his sponsor duties and promoting the product. Jackie and I made nice with him, we talked and for some stupid, stupid reason we all exchanged numbers so that we could meet up later.

I think I was so okay with it, because it was day light and the fact that Mike was another sexy beast. How can I convince him that Jackie is as ugly on the outside and she is on the inside? Oh well. You'll never see him again anyway, just have as much fun as you can.

The next thing we know all four of use follow Mike back to his hotel room where 3 of his friends are waiting. Okay, wait! So, ummm... Why is it that hot guys all have ugly friends. I mean, you expect that you meet one hot guy he will lead you back to the plethora of hot guy friends that he has. This was not the case. So, ended up spending the next few hour talking with these 3 men, and smoking pot (okay, so I didn't smoke, but I was surrounded by it and I felts like I was going to vomit!). Needless to say, I was ready to attempt the 4-5 hour journey home.

Mike and Jackie had other plans, and we were all dragged in (minus the ugly men). Off to San Fransisco we would go. Of course we HAD to take separate cars, ours and Mike in his own, because that is where we would part ways. And of course, you guessed it. Jackie rode with Mike the whole way down. Have I mentioned that she was a slut? Well, she is.

The trip turned out to be pointless as Mike and Jackie "lost us" shortly after we went through the toll on the bridge and we didn't get back with them for an hour. That was we were calling them for an hour trying to find them, mean while we were completely lost and couldn't find a gas station, and it was dark. Yea, Jackie is a slut, and a bitch!

Finally, when we "found" them, it was time to head home. Jackie kissed Mike good-bye. *clears throat* weren't you just making out with James last night?

We didn't get home until 2 or 3 in the next morning, we found out Jackie, being the bitch that she is, told everyone we were hanging out with that Katrina and I were 15 (excuse me! I was 16!), and I gave Sara $20 to get my double prints of the pictures she took. I never got them. So, I have no proof. I am kind of curious if I would find James or Mike half as cute as I did back then knowing what I know now?

This trip was one of the stupidest things I ever did, I was half miserable the whole time, due to Jackie being an attention whore, or just a whore, you pick, and the whole lying thing. I'm a a terrible liar to begin with, unless of course I was telling my mother that I was going to bed, when in actuality I was on my way out the door to go to a party. I am pretty sure this was the last big lie that I told, and it was more of a lie of omission.

The Time I Almost Got to Party with Smash Mouth (Part 2)

If you are new, tune in here to read the first part of this, I-have-no-idea-how-many-parts mantra of mine.

So where are we at?

- I was 16
- Going into my Freshman year of college
- Just got my belly button pierced without my Mom's approval
- AND I told her
- She agreed to let me go to Santa Rosa to "hang out" with Smash Mouth under the following conditions:
- Sara's cousin would be there
- No drinking (HA! Okay, Mom)
- I call her every few hours to check in (I love my Mom and her checking in!)

We are driving to Santa Rosa. Woot! Woot!

I was driving with 3 pot heads, well they weren't entirely pot heads, they smoked a lot, but not.. okay, they were pot heads. I never smoked pot, at least, I didn't want too because I was trying out for volleyball, and I couldn't confirm, but didn't know if they drug tested.

We were, oh I don't know, 2 1/2 hours away from home when EVERYTHING started coming out the closet.

There was no Jack (The male cousin). Wait, there was a Jack, but he certainly didn't know where we were going, who we would be with, and he never made any plans to meet us there.

Uh! Nice that they told me this NOW! I mean, that was one of the only reasons I felt safe enough to want to go. In fact, looking back I probably would not have even THOUGHT about going had it not been for that one piece of information.

But what could I do? I was 2 1/2 hours away from home, I was 16, and I had no way back home. I had NO CHOICE, I had to go along with it. I suppose I could have called my Mom, sucked in my pride and ruined every one's trip. I didn't want that on my shoulders, and I didn't want to worry anyone. So what did I do? I kept my big fucking mouth SHUT!

We get to the hotel. This is it? You mean to tell me that we honestly are expected to believe Smash Mouth is going to be staying in this hotel? This Best Western style hotel. Yay right! you three have been had. Like I said before, I'm just along for the ride. That, was exactly when I knew, we would not be meeting Smash Mouth, we would not be getting tickets, and I highly doubt that we would even be doing anything like what the movies show.

I was kind of expecting a RAVE. Dangerous thing I was. I mean, while I didn't want to participate in any of it. I wanted to see it like in the movies, the girl snorting coke in the bathroom, the threesome going on in the bedroom, the hookah in the living room, and the loud music, bright colors, and glow sticks! You can't forget about the glow sticks. My dream were shattered. My heart was crushed.

They had been taken for by Ted and James, but I was taken for by them. You live you learn, right? I kept telling myself that if at any time I felt uncomfortable I would just retreat to my room and if they felt like having sex with them, they could damn well take it to THEIR room, not to the one we were all sharing.

They finally got a hold of Ted and James and we made arrangements to meet with them later. Not before Ted weaseled his way over to our hotel room, because he was like, the very next one over. Creepy! I didn't see what Katrina saw in Ted. From what I could tell he had acne scars, looked too hold, THOUGHT (meaning he thought he was, but he really wasn't) he was a smooth talker, AND thought he was someone important. He wasn't and I saw through his fake facade. My people skills proved him to be, as Katrina had said, harmless. That doesn't mean he wasn't trying to weasel his way into her pants.

Later that night I had the pleasure of meeting yummy eye candy, I-wish-you-would-try-to-jump-into-my-pants James. He was the tall dark and handsome type. 6'2", jet black hair, broad shoulders, blue hypnotizing eyes, washboard abs, and a British accent. The British accent had me sold. Oh he was yummy. I only wish he wasn't so interested in the slutty red head, Jackie. UGH! Men and their poor taste. I got over it quick! They would never see him again, probably never talk to him again, and I didn't want to get laid that bad. Good luck, my friend.

I of course was the first to suggest going to the pool. I wanted to show off my big boobs, and (at the time) rockin' body. I had already gotten a peak at Jackie's stomach rolls on the car ride there, and in the hotel room while she was changing. I don't think he would be impressed. I win! Bitches are scandalous. The things us women do for attention.

We hung out in the pool, got yelled out from an old man off of the balcony. Apparently we woke him up. He called the hotel staff shortly after. We were kicked out of the pool, I guess that makes it the second pool I've been kicked out of.

With nothing else to do, and no where to go, since they were entertaining minors (I still maintained my age of 16) we went back to our rooms to clean up and then met back up again (It was probably midnight when we saw them again, a whopping 30 minutes of non communication).

I of course, maintained my end of the bargain by calling my mom and checking in. If I didn't she would know something was up, and I was trying to establish trust here. Word of the wise, checking in is not a bad thing. I never felt childish for checking in, and I knew that my Mom loved and cared for me. THAT is why she needed to hear my voice when I was away. She needed to hear I was raped and abandoned in an alley somewhere. Which little did she know at the time, very well could have happened on this stupid trip! As I said before, I had been had. But, I should have known better!

We went to their "Roady" bus. It wasn't that bad. In fact, coming from someone who had never seen a tour bus or Roady bus before, it looked about like I expected it. Bigger on the inside that what it appeared on the outside. There was even this "lounge" area in the back. Oh and beds! Oh many times did I picture James throwing me down on that bed during the next hour or so? I'm willing to bet, a lot. Us yougin' are horny little things.

We sat in the lounge area and they offered us vodka. PERFECT! I love vodka! There was a catch? They had nothing to mix it with.

"You got ice?"

"Yea."

"Lemon?"

"No."

"Lime?"

"No."

What the hell is wrong with these people. Either they are incredibly stupid in the art of seduction or incredibly smart. I still vote stupid.

"Then vodka and ice it is."

Myself and the boys were the only ones drinking. No one else was capable of stomaching straight vodka. PUSSIES! I do love the taste of vodka, good vodka that is and they were definitely giving my good vodka. My first drink lasted a whole 10 seconds. Ted then felt compelled to point out this was a "sipping" vodka, and not meant for shots.

---------

I am running out of time to write this. Until next time.

The Time I Almost Got to Party with Smash Mouth (Part 1)

This is one of those posts that was inspired by another. Here is the blog that made me want to get THIS event out of my head!

Go ahead and read it... What did you think?

Anyway, this is going to be about my aforementioned road trip. I don't even think my Mom knows the whole trust, I either never confessed it or was too embarassed. I hope she doesn't read this.

----

"PLLEEEASE.... Mooommm! Can I go? Pretty please? Katrina and I are going to be the only 16 years old (Good God! Has it been that long?). Sara and Jackie are like 22, and Sara's cousin is going to be there! He is a big guy, Mom. I've never met him, but Katrina's parents have and they say he is big and will protect us if anything bad happens."

Mom: "I'll think about it."

"But Mooomm! They are leaving tomorrow, you don't have time to think about it. If I'm going then I have to stay there tonight, and it's late and there just isn't time to think about. Mom, PLEEEASE! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity."

"Okay fine."

"Wait, I can go?"

"Yes."

Umm... That was a little too easy...

-----------

Let me explain... It was the summer going into my Freshman year of college, I was only 16 (I'm kinda smart), it was the day AFTER I got back from spending 2 weeks in Corning with my old baby sitter (who ironically, isn't MUCH older than I and really cool!) where I has just gotten my belly button unprofessionally pierced without my Mom's permission and I told her, in hopes to build trust (that's me, forgiveness is better to ask for than permission) AND I was trying to convince my Mom to let me go with an old friend, Katrina of the fence hopping Katrina's, and 2 older girls, who I had never met, but one of them Sara, had a Dad who substituted for my elementary classes Back in the day. Sara's cousin, we'll call him Jack, was suppose to meet us in Santa Rosa, and "protect" us.

Why were we going to Santa Rosa? Well, Sara, Jackie, and Katrina went to the fair in Medford and watched Smash Mouth perform. After one of the songs, Sara stood up and gave them a standing ovation. Normally, this wouldn't have been a big deal, although Sara has severe muscular dystrophy and was in a wheel chair. The drummer of Smash Mouth (Michael Urbano) saw this happen. He then came out with a white carnation and gave it to her.

After the show they (not me, as I wasn't there, or "into" that stuff) ended up smoking pot with a couple of the Roadies, let's call them Ted and James. Ted and James then invited the 3 of them to Santa Rosa, Smash Mouth's home town, for their performance at THAT fair the very next weekend. They were going, no matter what. I was invited later.

-------------

Before talking to me Mom...

Me: "So, we are going to be staying at the same hotel as the Roadies?"

Katrina: "Yea, but you have to be quiet about your age, they don't know I'm 16, they think I am 18."

Me: "You lied about your age? I don't feel comfortable lying."

"Christie, you look like your 25, you can lie about you age and they wouldn't know they wiser."

"Okay, tell him I am 17, almost 18. I'll still be a miner. I can't believe you like that guy! How old is he?"

"30. But he is really cute, and sweet and he says he likes me, a lot."

"How can Ted like you, you spent a few hours with him! He just wants to get laid."

"He's not like that."

"How do you know? You don't even know him."

"I can just tell. You know how you can just tell."

"Yea I know what you me." - I totally didn't get it! But I was down just for the ride. Plus, my best friend was in Petaluma and maybe I would be able to meet up with her for a little bit.

I knew the whole trip sounded shady. A lot of stuff was being left out that I didn't even know. But it sounded like fun. Plus, the roadies actually said that Smash Mouth would be staying at the same hotel as us. Interesting, it should be a nice hotel... You'll find out later... AND really? I mean I know big rock star bands are cool cats and all. But I doubt they will be spending their time with "the likes of us."

It was a road trip I was down for it...

Stay tuned to find out what happened next...

Back in Business

An update from this post.

1. Met The Parents

Unsuccessful - Dad was out of town. So, what did he do? How about you meet Mom instead? Oh great!

She was nice, didn't talk much (but Lover already warned me months ago that she wasn't much of a talker). I'm pretty sure she liked me, but again, I don't care either way.

I'm suppose to be meeting Dad soon.

2. Weight Gain

Must have been retaining water. Got some iPhone Apps to help out. How about Calorie Tracker, Couch to 5K, and Weight Watcher. So Couch to 5K seems really cool, it gets potatoes off the couch and running 3.1 miles in 9 weeks. (Can you say new blog?) The down side? I have to be consistent, and by consistent - I mean every day! :(

3. Vacation

See Sedona and Starbucks!

4. Reunited

I don't know what I was thinking before! Some people are just busy! So it was really nice to get with them again. Between my complaints of flakiness, I don't think I have mentioned how good of people these two are! And the age thing.. hmm... Well, I know SHE doesn't have a problem. But, I still think he does. Time will tell. I had greek food for the first time!

5. Job Hunt

I didn't get the job I applied for. I'm keeping my head high and I'll keep looking...

6. Back in Business

The first bartending gig of the new season went GREAT! I'm so glad to have made some money, I mean, I actually made some money!!!

The First 2 Months Are the Hardest

<--- The first picture we took together, from my cell phone.

Well folks, it has officially been 2 months since the Boyfriend, Lover, and I have moved in together. Despite the warnings, precautions, and post-moving scares we received from our friends we made it, and happily.

A few responses we got when people found out we were moving in together.

"Be careful! The first 2 months are the hardest!" This was the most common. Followed by:

"He/she is going to get on your nerves."

"You have to adjust and remember to compromise, a lot."

"Try not to fight too much."

"It's going to be hard, trust me!"

Me: "We don't really understand what people mean by the first two months are hard. Everything is great for us!"
Friend (who just recently had her boyfriend move it): "Oh no! Trust me girl! They are hard! The first two months are the hardest!"

The first picture we took together, as a couple. --->

Well, now we have made it 2 months into living together and things are great! I couldn't love him more, we are there for each other, and we still have not had a single argument. Unless you count me yelling at him NOT to do the dishes on Sunday because I wanted him to spend the next 20 minutes before he had to go to work with me and not cleaning (something I can do while he is away at work, because I had nothing better to do).

Couple Friends

Text Conversation:

US – “Hey Bro [clearly not me texting here] do you and Jane* want to get together and do something tonight?”
THEM – “Sure what do you have in mind?”
US – “Dinner and a movie? OR we could just hang out by the pool, catch up, and relax.”

[Jeopardy music playing in the background]

30 minutes later…

THEM – “Hey Bro [clearly directed towards Lover], Jane just passed out on the couch, I don’t think tonight is a good night.”

So, this was at 6:30 pm on a Friday night. Yea, Lover and I need new friends. I mean, seriously? If you didn’t want to hang out, why wouldn’t someone just say he or she wasn’t in the mood? OR if you didn’t like ideas, why wouldn’t you suggest something else?

On another night, Lover and I were going to gather a bunch of our friends together and have a big dinner. There were 20 people (including us). Within 24 hours of the dinner, 16 people backed out! The only people who went to the dinner was me, Lover, my Mom, and Step-Dad.

I really don’t think that something is wrong with us, because we are good people. Wait, did I mention that these were all HIS friends that were backing out?

Don’t be mistaken, my friends back out too. Only, my friends consist of my Dad’s ex girlfriend (ya, I know) and her boyfriend (who I can’t stand). She sort of tells me the truth though. She is a 33 year-old-woman, with 2 divorces, and 3 kids, who is not “allowed” to hang out with me. Her boyfriend thinks that I, a 20 year-old young woman with 3 degrees, no kids, and a loving boyfriend, is a bad influence. Who are we kidding here? The saddest part of it all, is that she listens. Yup.She.Listens.

So… I will say it again. Lover and I need new friends, non flaky ones, who enjoy going out. You can be single or a couple. Although, we do ask that if you are a couple, you cannot be consumed in your relationship, because if you are consumed in your relationship you will only want to hang out with the other partner, and THAT would make you like our current friends.

Anyone else in the market? We will send you our resume!

*name changed to protect identity :P