I Play Chicken

You know that stoplight in your town that when you come to it, it opens up to another lane, and then once you go through the light that right lane ends? You know those cars that drive through it EVERY single day on their way to or from work? You remember those PAIN in the ASSES who insist on getting in that right hand lane to try and speed up to get ahead of 2 extra cars in order to save 5 seconds on their commute while costing everyone else 30 seconds and some stress and terror?

My job is to eliminate those ASSHOLES one at a time. They KNOW the lane is going to end, they drive it EVERY DAY! Their persistence to get ahead of me, is not quite has strong as my persistence to make sure they do not get ahead of me. For example, this morning:

Am I going to close today? Am I going to close today? I really don't want to reschedule everything! I hope we close today! Red light. Damn it. Look at these stupid cars next to me! I'm not letting them in. Assholes! You know that fucking lane closes! Why are you trying to go straight! Stupid! I'm not letting you. Haha! You'll see. Ooo! Green light.

At this point the car in front of me slowed down as two cars raced ahead of him to merge over. However, there was one lone ranger who thought that it was "her turn" to merge and that I was going to let her over. She was mistaken. I rode the ass of the car in front of me so tightly!

I'm not letting you over stupid blonde bitch! And you can honk your horn all you want, I'm not looking over at you. You know what, Bitch? I have the right away, and I don't have to let you in if I don't want to. I know what you are trying to do, you're in an SUV, you can't intimidate me! I'll play chicken, I won't hit you, you'll hit me, which means your at fault. I don't really feel like going to work today anyway!!! HAHA! That's right, hooker! HIT. YOUR. BRAKES.

At the very moment she was forced to brake, she was not only honking her horn, and turning on her blinkers like I am going to give up the place I fought so hard for to pull over and "talk" about it. Ya right! My iPod then started playing...


I play chicken with the train, play chicken with the train, train. uh huh huh. uh huh huh. You know that I play chicken with the train, play chicken with the train, train. - Cowboy Troy

I couldn't help BUT to blurt out the words and crack up!

Did I mention I did the 25 mile/hour speed limit the ENTIRE 6 miles on the one lane road? That was priceless! I think that blonde bitch is still pissed at me and I'm still laughing!

Coffee or Hot Chocolate?

How about both?

Last week/weekend was horrible. In fact, it wasn't like an actual weekend, but an extension to the work week. Here is how things went.

Thursday

Work 7-6
Work 7-12
Sleep

Friday

Work 7-6
Dinner with friends 7-10
Sleep

Saturday

Move 7-2X
Work 3X-12
Sleep

Sunday

Move 8-3X
Visit with friends 3X-7
Sleep

I barely had time to eat, let alone sleep this weekend. I am still worn out. For the first time, I smelled coffee and wanted some! I don't even like coffee. I poured myself a cup and was debating over regular or hazelnut creamer. I came to the conclusion it didn't matter which I choose I would still be gagging this shit down. That's when I saw it. The box of hot chocolate. Hot chocolate? Hot chocolate! But that was too sweet! So, I did what anyone would do. I used the packet of hot chocolate as creamer so now I have a yummy coffee that tastes like it could have came from Starbucks, only it didn't cost me $6.89!!!!

YAY! I know I've said it before. I'm a genius! They should promote me!

60 Days

It's taken me awhile to be able to talk about this.

Last Friday, actually, I believe it was the Friday before last we got a phone call from our builder representative. 60 days she tells me. She tells me the house will be done in 60 days. That is CRAZY! Lover and I expected that they would be done with the house in June, which worked out perfectly since out lease is up the end of March.

Perfect timing because after our lease, we were going to go live with his Mom until the house was done and save money. Now? It looks like the house is going to be done around the same time that our lease is up. Maybe even a little after. So, the plan is to stay with his Mom only until we close escrow. So, that will only be about 2 weeks of saving money for us.

Let me tell you for SURE. That now we are at about 50 days away from being Home Owners my mind can't think of anything but the negative. What if the loan falls through? What if we can't close escrow when the builders says we need to close? What if? What if? What if?

UGH! My stomach is in constant butterfly mode and it hasn't made it's way back up the ladder since it dropped 2 Friday's ago. We should be getting some good news tomorrow and I am SOOO looking forward to having that in my hands.

This Year...

It's New Years Resolution time!!! Have you thought about what you are going to accomplish this year? You have a whole year to do it!!!



2009 was actually the first year that I kept my resolution. Since I was 13 I have had the same resolutions:

1. Loose weight

2. Eat less sweets.

3. Don't eat out often.

4. Quit smoking.

5. Stretch more.



Can you guess what my resolution was for last year?



To quit smoking.



And I did it! Around June time I drew in my last breath of Kool's Super Long and exhaled into a new life. I don't notice any CHANGES to not smoking, expect for the noticeable 5-10 pounds I put on. Sucks right? But the alternative is lung cancer, so I guess I'm still doing pretty good for myself. I really have Lover to thank for not smoking. I mean, he isn't a smoker; so I didn't smoke around him, and then I started "hiding" the smoking (he thought I quit in March) and then in June we moved in together. I figured there was NO WAY I would be able to live with him and be a smoker and think he wouldn't figure it out soon. So, I quit. Cold turkey. I guess I loved Lover more than I loved cigarettes.



For this years resolution I had to think about it for a long time. Not a LONG time, but I mean, I really put some thought into it.



Last year, in the beginning or the year, I read a lot of books. I like to read smutty trashy romance novels. OH! And I had the pleasure of reading the entire Twilight series. YIPPE! So, I would like to read a lot more.



In 2009, I also discovered what it felt like to fall in love. Even more importantly, I discovered what it felt like to BE loved. To truly be loved and be held by warm and loving hands. I have no doubts this spirit will carry out throughout the rest of mine and Lover's life.

If you haven't figured it out already... Lover and I are buying a home. The home buying process is STRESSFUL and I HATE having to deal with it. In the end, I just want to be in my home, curled up in my new bed and drinking lots of wine. :P So, this why I have decided to dedicate my entire year to this house. By the end of the year, I want to not only be living in, but have my home decorated to my liking so that in 2011 the only thing I have to worry about it where I put the wine glasses to dry! :P

All I Want For Christmas - Day 8

Today, I just want...

Everything to fall into place, at the right time.

I have nothing else to add...

Christie's Wish List:
1. Paid off furniture.
2. My dream home.
3. A nap.
4. My hair done.
5. The new PostSecret book/go to the event.
6. Laser hair removal.
7. A milkshake.
8. Work Out.

All I Want For Christmas - Day 2

Its Day 2 of The All I Want For Christmas special.

To know me is to know that I don't ask for much. In general, I take initative to make sure that people are comfortable, happy, and have what they want when in my presence. I hope that others would do the same for me. After all, doesn't the phrase say, "Treat people the way you want to be treated."

Today, is out design center appointment. This probably means nothing to you, but to me it means the next 30 years. Lover and I get to pick out everything we want for our home from the tile and carpet, to the cabinets and accent walls. We have a limit of $19,740 in upgrades (all of which will be rolled into the mortgage). $3,800 of that is reserved for our BIG master shower. We choose to forgo the shower and seperate tub, for one bigger shower instead. I know what you are thinking. And you are totally right! That is exactly why I want a big shower. Having a big shower leaves a little amount of money left to upgrade.

The following needs to be upgraded:

- The laminate tile to ceramic 18X18 tile
- The carpet to that new stuff where the elephant lived on it and then they cleaned it and it held up REALLY well. Yea, that recycled stuff. I want that.
- From Oak cabinets to maple (I hate the seeing age lines on wood, eventually we will upgrade to bamboo cabinets, cause I LOVE bamboo everything)
- Sun Shades on all the windows, because here in AZ we need all the protection we can get.
- A Washer and Dryer
- Upgraded appliance (fridge not included)
- Painted accent walls We figure that those 3 upgrades will pretty much take all of our money for upgrades.

Which is really sad, because that leaves no spare money for the fun stuff like:

- Surround sound throughout the house (see, this is nice because the speakers are flush with the wall, there are no wires showing, and it's THROUGHOUT the house.
- Our fridge. It would be awesome if we could roll this into the mortgage
- Nice lighting, cause lighting can be really expensive.
Pool table
A Bar (yea, I will have one, maybe not right away, but I will.have.one)
- Granite counter tops
- Marbella in the bathroom instead of the white ceramic.

All I want for Christmas is...

My dream home, equiped with all that was mentioned above.

Christie's Christmas Wish List:
1. Paid off furniture
2. My dream home

All I Want For Christmas - Day 1

It's Day 1 of the All I Want for Christmas edition in this blog.

We're buying a house, and the other weekend we bought furniture. Technically, we put it on layaway, same thing, right? We plan on using the First Time Home buyer tax credit that we will get to pay it off. However, this is assuming that we close escrow by June 30th, which might be a problem depending upon when they have the house finished and ready for us to move in. It would be so nice if that furniture was paid off before that time. Let's say, today! And without someone else's income other than mine and Lovers.

All I want for Christmas is...

Our layaway furniture to be paid off.

Christie's Wish List:
1. Paid off furniture

It's so Stressful. I Want to Cry.

Lover and I are buying a house. And.It.Makes.Me.Want.To.Cry...Massive.Amounts.Of.Tears.

The whole process is just a big long shitty, stressful one. Stressful ONE!

So, 2 weeks ago we bought our bed. AWESOME, right? Yea, it is awesome. We got a screaming deal, a great comfortable bed, and we came in about $200 under budget. :D Oh wait. We didn't BUY the bed, we put it on layaway, and Lover will be making weekly payments until it is paid off the end of March. Can you believe that places still have layaway? I thought they did away with all that bogus back when plastic became popular. Lucky for us, they didn't. Who wants to pay interest on something anyway? And to be honest, I really DON'T want or need the bed right away. I would rather them just deliver to out home, when we get it.

This past weekend we went and bought out furniture. What.A.Night.Mare.NightMARE! Let me make myself clear, I do NOT like furniture stores, nor do I like furniture salesmen and it was just our luck that we got stuck with... the new guy. We were in that store FAR longer than what we wanted to be, especially since we had already came in the week before and picked out everything that we wanted so all we needed to do was negotiate. We were there for 2 hours and there was little negotiating! We took some things off (that we wanted but didn't need) and finally worked out the price that we budgeted for it. PERFECT! Everyone is happy, right? Wrong!

Not more than 10 minutes after we left the F'ing place we get a phone call from the salesman. Apparently, his high school diploma is worthless, because he doesn't even possess the skills of basic math. He "forgot" to add in one of the MAJOR pieces of furniture into his calculation. He says, "Don't worry, I changed it and had my manager sign off, so your new total is [yadda yadda]." Hmm... I'm sorry, but that just isn't the price that works for me and don't you need my signature for some LEGAL reasons. Like you can't tell me I owe X amount of dollars and then change it to Y amount once I sign the papers and am not there to defend myself.

"Do I need to come down to sign anything?"
"Oh no you don't need to do that, we took care of everything."
"Except we didn't agree on the price you are saying, we agreed upon the price I signed off on, and who the hell are you to just change the amount you know nothing of what we can afford or what we have budgeted."
"Well, it just is not necessary for you to come down, you can if you want, if it makes you feel better." - Who he fuck does this guy think he is. I wish I had more time or knew a lawyer because I am almost positive that he would have been binded to what we originally agreed on, and that's just tough shit he fucked up.
"Well, it does. In fact, we want to cancel the whole contract, I'll see you tomorrow."

Yes, I don't do well with salesman, I don't like feeling taken advantage of, and don't you DARE try to tell me I have to pay for your mistake. I'll be done with you faster than you can say, "douche bag." Lover gets this pouty look on his face and doesn't say much, just listens to me bitch, and asks a million time what we are going to do. Ugh! Weren't you listening? We are cancelling the furniture. We can go somewhere else.

Lover then sticks out his lip, puts his head down, looks up at me, and says in the sweetest voice he can muster, "but I don't want to cancel the furniture."

That's just FUCKING GREAT!
At least he made me laugh, in fact, he made me crack up and I briefly forgot how pissed off I was at the Ass jockey from the furniture store.

Fine, we will go back tomorrow and try to work out another deal. I in fact, went online to do some more research. They were having some sales on buying a dresser and mirror and getting the bed (meaning the headboard/baseboard/foot board) for free and I saw something about spending over $2,000 and getting $400 off. SO, now I would be going in there MORE prepared tomorrow.

I did and took the fucker by storm. Not only that, but I dealed almost solely with the manager instead. Screw the new guy and his 3rd grade math skills. Anyway, we ended up going with different furniture, got a better deal of the living room set, and got more "taken off" than originally offered of advertised.

So, with the furniture and bed we came in about $300 over budget. I am hoping to get us back on track when we buy the TVs, refrigerator, and deep freezer. We are going to Sears and

Lover thinks that we will also be buying a pool table. I responded by telling him that will only happen if I get my bar and Kegorator. He said he would give up a TV. He would give up a TV for a pool table. Not only that, but he will give up the TV in the bedroom for it. He didn't want one in there to begin with. I DID. So, again he is sacrificing nothing. We are still in heated negotiation.

On another note, Obama extended the deadline. It looks like we will actually be able to benefit! Yippee! So now, we are racking our brains and it seems like all we think about is this fucking house, and getting the fucking loan, and what we are going to put in the fucking thing! UGHH!!

A Mattress DOUBLES In Weight Over 10 Years...

Look it up. It's gross! Find a good mattress cover, and I don't mean those cloth ones either. You need a good mattress cover!