The Spitters

He walks out the door, shoulders back and swagger in his step. You see him as confident man and you want to pounce. He continues on his way, slight cocks (cocks. haha.) his head to the right and without expression, the pucking of his lips, a further tilt of his head, or looking down from his focus, he does it. He spits. Your mind races and you replay the event in his head. Suddenly it makes since. *LIGHT BULB* That wasn't confidence in his step, it was arrogance; much like this man below. This portrayal of his attitude, that he is suddenly cooler, more manly, and desireabl because he can spit.

You can't mistake hawking a luigi for spitting, they are different. One involves the use to snot passing through your nasal passage, into your throat, and over your taste buds before combining with spit and leaving your mouth. Sounds sexy right? The sexy man to my right? He hawks luigis, still think he is as sexy? Do you still want his tongue in your mouth? Do you still want to put your tongue in HIS mouth? I think not. It's something we don't like to think about, and we don't think about it, because we rarely see anyone do it. But when we do, he goes from looking like the man on the right, to looking like the man above! Out of sight, out of mind, right? Anyway, I am talking about spitting here, not hawking a luigi, but same concept.

I see so many young, ignorant men do it, spit. It's gross. No one on this planet wants to walk around on, step on, or see the nasty vileness that comes from anther's mouth.

See... Since I have 3 Phd's in this kind of thing, I think I am qualified to determine the psychological reasons as to why some men do it. I have put together the following of why men spit.

Power. or the lack of. Some men are in a position where they feel like they are the most powerful person, everything would go wrong with out them, and so they spit. Sometimes they think about it before they do it. Their spit is strategically planned out to make sure the desired people see him do it. Or, maybe he does it all the time.

Respect. This spitter thinks that by spitting, he is demanding more respect and that those who see him do it will thus give him more respect. It kind of goes back to the power thing. You see, the more respect this spitter has, the more power he has, or the more more he THINKS he has. He is really making himself look like an arrogant buffoon, like this guy on the left.

Coolness. Others just think it is "cool," and we all know that the most respected and powerful men spit, right?

Manly. Some think spitting is a manly gesture. They think it makes them look more masculine and thus can gain power, respect, and coolness from his peers.

Territorial. Let me explain. Man standing at the bus station, sees his friend coming toward him. "Hey man," spits, "how's it going." Friend: "Not bad, just waiting for the bus to come." Spitter: Spits again, "That's cool man." spits.

ugh! STUPID! Just because you got there first, does not mean that the bus stop is YOURS, you can stop spitting now, you weren't going it before he showed up, there is no need to do it now.

The real reasons they spit?

Self-Conscious. They lack the respect, power, and cool factor and think they can gain it through stupid male social mechanisms. If you don't got it, you just wont get it.

I just want to say that you are arrogant, uncool, disgusting, and you do not, in the slightest, look any bit of masculine or cool.

In case you are wondering. Shit Talker brought this on. I see something moving in my peripheral (while playing on the Internet) blogging I look-up. 90% of the time it is Shit Talker, leaving that cave of an office and pretending to do something of importance. 100% of the time, he does exactly what the story says. he spits. EVERY TIME! He spits every fucking time! I just want to run up and punch him in the face because he looks like an idiot! I would much rather him look like and idiot with a broken nose/black eye that I gave him!

Bitch Boy, Pot Stirrer, and Shit Talker

I have given yet another nickname to a co-worker. Bitch Boy. This goes to our new "safety manager." First, he is not above nor below me in status, he makes more money, far more money than I, but that does not mean he is better than I. Second, his boss doesn't even work at this facility so he doesn't even seem like an actual employee of my workplace. and Thirdly, I hardly ever see him, he does not have a company phone, and there is literally NO way (other than e-mail) for me to get a hold of him. This fact alone does not bother me in the slightest. What does bother the living fuck out of me, is that Bitch Boy does not provide his contact information to his customers or vendors so that they can follow up with him AND he gives out the company phone number to these people so that they can "contact" him. However, he is completely unreachable by this number.

Bitch Boy is not the only person I have this problem with. Shit Talker (yes, another new nickname), is also in a separate office and not reachable through the office phone. However, HE has a company cell phone and I give out that number openly and freely. There is another one out of these three that is also unavailable by land line, we will call him Innocent By Stander, because I LIKE him, and he is always more than willing to help me out. Plus, he has almost no authority, much like myself and can't control not having a cell phone (because Shit Talker and Shit Talker's management took it away).

So, we have Bitch Boy, Shit Talker, and Innocent By Stander (IBS).

I have the luxury of being yelled at, rudely spoken too, and hung up on on a daily basis because "our company needs to get their shit together," "I am lying," or "Bitch Boy told them he could be reached at this number." Well, a few weeks ago I was fed up with it. I e-mailed Bitch Boy and asked for his contact information so that I can give it to these people when they call. He responded by saying that the people who needed it already had it, and he doesn't want to deal with anyone else.

My response. Well, I guess they are SOL.

Flash forward to yesterday morning.

I finally had enough. I was yelled at by one person too many. This time, the phone call was in regard to IBS; however, I had enough of it.

I sent out another e-mail to all 3 of them stating, and I quote:
"When you do business with someone, please make sure that you give them the needed information in order to get back a hold of you (Other than the main office line, as you cannot be reached via this line). This would be great as I am tired of being hung up on and bitched at because they can’t reach you.

Thanks!
Christie"

So, I realize that I probably could have worded it differently, but I was pissed and BITCHED was the word that best described what was happening to me.

Bitch Boy, decided to ignore my e-mail and pass it on to Shit Talker, in which he basically said that I was a horrible person, employee, and should "have a talking too." Now look here... Don't tell someone I need a "talking to." And second of all, if you had a problem, the first step is to confront the person you have a problem with. Isn't this what we learned in Kindergarten through that whole problem solving shit where you start off stating how you feel and by the end of the damn exercise you are hugging the person who you punched in the face after they put wet sand down your pants?

Anyway, more anger arises from the fact that later that day my boss comes to me and says we need to talk. Now, my boss doesn't talk to me. No really, he doesn't talk to me. Only every now and then to ask a question, in which I answer directly and he leaves my office. So, we he starts off saying we need to talk, I flip and start racking my brain of WHAT THE FUCK I possibly did wrong within the last month.

Then, he calls in Mrs. No Holey Jeans, and we go to the conference room for a "meeting." Umm... Well, he takes longer than he should to get there and all I can think about is the "big wigs" that are coming into the office the next day and how they just had all this budget meeting shit, and OH FUCK they are getting rid of my position! Then, my eyes swell with tears and I get a fucking toad in my throat (kind of like what is happening now, because the thought of loosing my job upsets me soo soo much!) and I have to choke everything back, because I will not let Mrs. No Holey Jeans see me cry. And will my fucking boss just bring his ass in here and get it over with already. I'm going to cry. Not only am I going to cry, I am going to bawl, and there will be snot and mascara running and I don't see a box of tissues up here.

Finally! My boss comes in and hands me a piece of paper. AHAHAHAHA! It's my e-mail! And Bitch Boys e-mail to Shit Talker and Shit Talker's boss, Pot Stirrer's, response to my boss and my bosses response to all of them. WOW! Wait! Shit Talker sent this to Pot Stirrer, but Shit Talker's response is not included in this e-mail. Pot Stirrer DELETED IT! OH! I get it.

So, first. It was funny that even Pot Stirrer (who gained his name for other reasons as well) took my side by simply saying, this is not a matter of who is right or wrong. This is a communication issue and maybe you 3 (meaning, Shit Talker, Bitch Boy, and IBS) need to have a meeting to resolve it.

My boss, Teddy Bear (I am naming him this, because I was told once that he was a big Teddy Bear) then told them all that he would talk to me, but communication was important, this was the first he had heard of it, and if they have a problem contact him directly next time and he will handle it.

First, Teddy Bear is a great boss. He sticks up for his employees, even when they could have done something differently or approached it in a different way. AND he explains things to said employee *cough* HOW she can handle it differently, and that it might be better to just go to him (even though some times Teddy bear scares the shit out of her) and he will put them in their place. This makes me happy. Really happy, that my boss cares, sticks up for me, and doesn't back down.

Also, I think Mrs. No Holey Jeans needs to start taking lessons from him, because I really can't stand her careless attitude and Bitchiness! Fuck her! Although, she seems to tone it down, is much more helpful, and polite when Teddy Bear is around (also her boss). Imagine that!